the last day of 08

New Year's eve was the shiz, yo! It was heaps of fun all day long. I was laughing like a hyena the whole day, both with my UITM and Shah Alam buddies. Head swaying from side to side, hands all over the place, mouth wide open kinda laughs. (Not a good sight, trust me) We were a bunch of drunk hooligans in the streets of Shah Alam. What better way to kick start this year with the people I love around me.

Darlings, thank you for making the opening of 2009 a memorable one for me!

I love you all

im in my whiny+emotional mood.pls bare with me yea?

nak muntah makan byk sgt for dinner tadi.pening kepala coz there's smtg wrong with my pc.the colour of my screen is yellow.sgt sakit mata.if this continues,tanak switch on the net dah lah.thus written thoughts will be on hiatus mode for now.sedih pula rasanya:(

tmrw nite is new year's.i feel like celebrating this year but me mates dont feel like it.the boys have parties to attend to.i guess it'll be you and me baby.like always.maybe i shall write down some of my new year's resolutions.and try to stick with it this time.

speeches

i suck at impromptu speeches.i do,i really do.when out of the blue, someone calls my name asking me to gv a speech in front of a crowd,i automatically become this giggly chicken.it's embarrassing i tell ya.E-M-B-A-R-R-A-S-S-I-N-G!

lemme give u a couple of my tummy-flipped thwarting impromptu speeches i've experienced:-

18 yrs old,pre-degree part 2

Had this seminar mdm maftuhah forced us to attend. We were the eldest participants there,the rest were still in high school or should I say they were still babies. Half way through the seminar, half of our classmates left. I think they went to klcc. Anyway ,the rest of us stayed.and to our dismay, they started picking out candidates randomly to gv a speech in front of everyone. They’d give a random topic and expect you to gv your 2 cents about it. And because of that, I purposely chose a sit in front, near the speaker so the ‘kakak’ wont pick me but nooooo.she just had to pick me. She went past the speaker and quickly shoved a paper in my hand.ooh and I rmbr herne telling me that she had a feeling I’d be chosen. and boy was she right.oh well, lucky me. I got a topic entitled ‘popularity’. As I went up, I saw my mates grinning with encouraging eyes and smiles carved on their cute faces. And me being me, I started speaking gibberish with both my hands flying all over the place. I cant really rmbr what I said. But i rmbr touching on proms and handbags with loads of ‘likes’ in between. when I saw the audience’s puzzled looks, I said ‘u may think im a blonde or a bimbo but im not ok’and the crowd burst into fits of giggles.I seriously don’t know what got into me. why oh why did I say that.grr.embarrasing.

20 yrs old.yesterday.2 days before entering part 4(yesterday)

Yesterday was tok baba and tok bubu’s 50^th wedding anniversary.we held the ceremony at my hse. We sat in a circle as my uncle recited a few dua’s and nasihat about marriages. suddenly he started calling each and every one of us to give a speech on my grandparents.i sat behind k.shana thinking I could hide behind her and get away with it.and again,I was wrong.when my name was called, I nearly wet myself. I dunno how I looked,but I must have given a petrified look coz my cuz’s started laughing.(thanks guys,you guys are really supportive*note sarcasm*).I can rmbr my exact speech since it’s till fresh in mind:-

“assalamualaikum everyone.Tok ba and tok bu,thank you for everything.i appreciate the times we ‘ve spent together. the shopping sprees, the trips, the holidays, the dinners, the lunches, the tea breaks. I know I can always rely on the both of you when I need someone. With the both of u,I feel as tho.i could talk about anything from dishes,recipes,food,islam to boyfriends.and with that,I thank u”

Ok.that wasn’t so bad but I still feel I could’ve done better.grr.especially at the end.when I uttered boyfriends,I saw my dad adjusting his seat as sign of uneasiness.hahhahha.that was funny.but on a more serious note, I really do talk abbout boyfriends with them.seriously.and i do want to polish my speeches,esp impromptu ones.my English sucks, man.

Ok.i wanna go next door and play with my best friend, the baby.toodle dee doo.

(I just hafta include this.my parents are making out like crazy rite now.they think im not looking but I am.erk.disgusting.the sight of them kissing still gv me the shivers)

pink.

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bad day

i did something really bad today.wait.i did a couple of really bad things that im not proud of today and fuck,its not a good feeling(pls excuse my language.i swear when im upset)i feel like babbling all these to someone but heck,i dont really have anyone except u and my diary.usually i would turn to shahrir for comfort tp takkan lah everytime something goes wrong i'd turn to him.he's my ex-boyfriend for heavens sake.

and that feeling of not having anyone to talk to sucks.big time.

if only there's an invention where one could go back in time,today would definitely be one of those days.

rasa cam nak nangis je.babi lah.im big enough to not cry over petty things like this.i can go through this without shedding a single tear.its all my fault pon..i deserve to feel the way i do now.

serves me right.

bye bye year

2008 is coming to an end.frankly,im bummed.being the bum bummer i am,i'm bummed(just feel like rhyming there.hehe).being a year older means more responsibilities which will then result in more chaos and commotion.

2008 can be considered a good year for me.ive learned so many things, explored many ventures,went through a whole series of ups and downs,met great people and etc.but the prominent aspect I want to highlight here is that I believe I am a much wiser person than I was before.

The ‘good’ people I once believed was ‘all that’dosent seem so good after all.all this while,I saw what I wanted to see.this year I learn to unravel both the good and bad of people. I’m a tad disappointed I must say,but hey, im just a kid,they say.

Ive learned about myself too.ive learn to accept the person I am,flaws and all.and when Ive succeeded in that field,I believe I am a much happier person.i do things that makes me, ME and not soo much of what others wants me to be.gettit?

p.s->isn't my title just the corniest?:P

2009,here i come!